Luke 8:39

Trigger warning: talks/themes about self harm/eating disorder I've been trying to let this statement sit with me all day “the value of emptiness” its the title of my devotional this morning. And it definitely resonates with me after the week ive had trying to find purpose in my eating issues. On the 22 nd of February I decided to really change my “Diet”, I didn’t want this to be like every other time in my life where I'm focus is on loosing weight, because in the past (and probably even to this day) any focus on diet and exercise has been driven by the worlds views on “fat people” which is if your ‘fat’ you are ‘less than’ and the only way to have worth or to be ‘successful’ or to be loved is to be thin or fit into the worlds view of body standards.  And let me just say I FULL admire this new movement around body positive and accepting all bodies no matter there shape or size. The key to smashing shame is to not be driven by it anymore. However for me its my health that n...

  I’ve been wanting to sit down and write for awhile. I think I avoid this because of the emotions and feelings that come out when I express the deep parts of my soul. Who really wants to feel there feelings right? Lets just get right into the deep stuff Trigger warning : talks about suicide/self harm We just had the first camp of 2021, which was was extremely anxious to attend. I think what thats really about is how I perceive myself more then it being about not wanting to see anyone. I want to see all my friends all the time and that neediness in me that I feel or believe about myself freaks me the fuck out and so I try to counteract that by withdrawing. Something that's exhausting is my overthinking my relationships when im with others.  Im constantly trying to figure out is how im being in this moment with this person appropriate, fun, enriching and life giving to them? And if its not do I need to remove myself or tone myself down. This is the stuff that I don’t...